smackfoo.com | I find your lack of faith disturbing.

There is a defining moment in one’s life where one becomes aware that their quest for answers has potentially let them down.

In the process of submitting to both Round 4 and more recently, Round 5 - I lost sight of something important. And dropped the ball in the process.

It doesn’t matter if I ever make it into 9rules — and indeed some would argue that that is now an impossibility.. which is likely also quite true. What matters to me, is that I write what I find important, has value and what will challenge people’s views and inspire debate.

I have succeeded in the later, by ignoring the former and to the detriment of others. I have a habit of asking questions without any sugar coating. Some would call it “telling it like it is”, others would suggest it’s anything but.. in this case, I took a mis-step into assumption-ville — and for that, I apologise.

I have read comment that suggests I don’t know 9rules, because I don’t have a massive post count in my9r, or that I am obviously mistaken, or that I don’t know “everything”, or that I’m not aware of how much Tyme has done.

That’s possibly true - but I don’t spend my life reading and writing 9rules notes. I work on my craft, occasionally getting it right, and just as often make mistakes, I learn.. and hopefully, I grow as a result.

Everyone who has joined 9rules, started where I have. At the beginning. It’s easy to cast stones, to suggest that I am mistaken, how could I possibly understand.. and that, in a way, is my point. It’s easy to point out the flaws in others, to suggest they have no idea, it’s harder to question why something is and where the answers are.

I knew, going in, that the backlash would be swift.. and harsh.

I am sure that I have made no friends with my last post, that many are likely to un-subscribe and I accept the consequences of my actions. However.. others who have been waiting for an answer as to what is really, honestly, happening - now have that answer.

Something Tyme said, really caught my eye:

Keeping my word, I’ve been going through them, interacting with people and you know what? I like that. I like actually getting to know the people behind the blogs. Interacting with them, getting their thoughts on 9rules, their blog - things are coming out that never would have come out if Mike, Scrivs and I spent 5-10 minutes on the site with no contact.

That is simply amazing.

That someone who wears so many hats, that is a very active 9ruler, has taken the time and has no doubt helped many to improve their craft as a result. Again, I have the utmost respect for what Tyme has achieved — it just would have been cool to hear so much more about it.

It would have really driven me to go even further, knowing that maybe, at some point, I might get a little directive advice from 9rules. This is the thing that helps grow great content.. encouragement. It’s just hard to feel encouraged when so many wounderful things happen in the background, without that helping inspire others.

Tyme, I was foolish to have accidentally suggested that you don’t care — for that, again, I apologise. If anything, you have cared too much and the consequence has been pressure to do more, than perhaps is healthy to do.

I do not expect this post to fix anything. I doubt anyone is even listening..

I just hope it serves as a reminder that people can and do make mistakes, despite the best of intentions. Thus I return to the beginning and will simply continue to work on the blog, whether I ever make it into any network is no longer an important driver — I’ll continue to lurk in my9rules, to read and to learn.

Sometimes the most important thing one can do is listen (and then learn from it) — even when one is being reminded of how much of an asshat they were. ;)